Chennai 8 - Letters

Dear Siddharth its been more than two months that you have been studying at Pathashaala. We met last month and other than that our only way to communicate through letters. I am cherishing it and loving this way with you. 

I love reading all your letters and in the first two days of week, I start calling Postman to confirm your letter. Your first letter was reached me after three attempt by postman at our house. Now I have taken his mobile number and he confirms me whenever there is a letter. 

We share about each other life. I am glad that you write very honest just like me. It touches to my heart, stay always same. I wanted to write this post so that we can remember how beautiful our bond became thru these letters.

Chennai 7 - You and me..

I wanted to write about this post since the day you born. You are always there with me. Your presence is different from your brother. You always seem to be in your own world. 

We both together have explored the whole world on our own. The day you were three months, I took you everywhere where I needed to go for Siddharth school, my household chores, my business meeting. You are so adjusting that you never demand anything from me. In my board meeting now, you need a copy and pen to write and then you are again in your own world. 

You were born at a time, when I was at a peak of my career, but I decided to take  a back seat there to just be with you. May be you understand all this, and you support me always. Last few days when I was fixing a meeting with an architect, I did not realize to mention him that I will be bringing my two and half year old daughter. When we getting ready, I thought you come so naturally with me. 

Now in Chennai when we are alone, since your brother is in residential school. I am enjoying this time with you. You are my reflection, my strength and joy in my life. I am so excited and blessed that you are there with me my little Sai. Stay Blessed.

Chennai 6 - Live in present!!

When we visited you at Pathashaala, I had eyes full of tears looking at how thin you were. Yes you are looking smart, but for a mom a child is always thin. 

You shared so many things with us, First time in our life you talked the whole day and we just listened to you. I remember when I asked you whether you want to stay here for next year also, You said Mom lets live in present. Do not worry about future.

I was touched and amazed by the way you took care of Reet, you let her do things the way she wanted. She was so happy to meet you and was not letting us come close to you. 

You shared about symbiosis of animals, which was a new learning for me. You told me that for anything we have to stop ourselves. 

There was a mixed feeling of sadness and happiness we all went through. We enjoyed fully one day with you and you were so excited to show us around your playgrounds, solar fields, science park and library. Below are some pictures from our visit to you. 

They meet after 45 days

Siddharth Favourite bench where he reads his book

I am happy for you my son that you are enjoying your life.I am happy that i took this lesson of living in present from you today at aug19, 2014. I am with you in this journey of life called " Awakening of Intelligence"

Chennai 5 - Pathshaala

Siddharth My Son, 

Today its been 16 days that you have been moved to your residential school. This post was long due, but I was emotionally not ready to write same. 

The day you left for your new journey, I felt a huge vacuum has been created in me. I have never felt like same ever in my life. I was worried that If I am feeling so low, how you would be feeling. So I started giving strength to myself that we both have chosen this decision and we will go through this feeling. I know feeling from me to you passes very fast, So I wrote my points why I chose this school for you. You have so much of hunger in you to do different things in your life and that can be taken care at your school, you were open and wanted to explore this life for you. You will be in a positive and healthy environment always. 

Siddharth I know you will go through your own loneliness, the way I am going through. I knew that this will be tough for me but how much I think, I cannot prepare myself for this situation, irrespective of how hard I try. You and me were doing everything together from eating food to sleeping in night. I always thought that you were dependent on me, but after you left for your school. I realized it is other way around, I am more dependent on you, I cannot even decide for myself what to eat, what to do. You kept me so busy and always fulfilling your wishes that in whole process I became just the way you wanted me to be. I always enjoyed doing same. 

I am very happy that you chose this life for you, I believe you will chose your own destiny. I am writing this post for both of us as a memory to cherish, how we felt and why we chose this school for you.

I wish you good luck and you enjoy always your life at Pathashaala and make memories for both of us that we will be proud of!! 

Chennai 4 - A pink butterfly

Today morning when me and your brother were doing a painting session, we both wanted to finish our painting before you wake up.  As we know the moment you are up you would like to do what your bhai is doing. I know you are good at painting but you are good at so many other things also, like the pink butterfly which has so many hidden colors in her that you only know when you go near her. 

Today you are 30 months old. For a two and half year old child, your color of expression, behaviour are much more than your age. 

Independence is one which defines  you best. You can wear your sandals on you own, do not need any help in feeding. You do not like if anyone feeds you and I am only allowed at special foods like rice  kheer, milk biscuits,your favourite chocolate brownie. We cannot hide chocolates from you, you love them most and have an appetite for eating more than 10. Now you do not even need our help to open wrapper for you. You like to eat whole apple like me and sometimes like banana. More than fruit, you like peel of banana to press it on floor. I give you your own plate, but you like to eat from Bhai plate always. You are going to miss same now for four months as he is going for residential school. Do not worry take this as part of growing. 

Dressing up is always a fun time for you and me, you can distinguish very well between your clothes from others, about shoes you are never wrong. As you know clearly which shoes belong to whom in home. When you are ready, you bring my favourite chappal to me and commands in your clear voice, Pahno. You say it with so much of love and affection that no one can refuse you. When I apply cream at my face, you show me that twinkle in your eyes which only gets satisfied when I apply same cream to you. You love to wear bangles and dupatta. 

Implementation is one you have inherited from me most, you exactly know which word to be used in talking. You pick up things so fast from us, that we do not even get a chance to figure out from whom you picked these words. Now a days here in few days you have learned everyone name. When you call Puglandi, Shanker, Ragu , Vedamma, Alanggara  at Srishti they all look forward to you more than me. And to share one more thing with you, they have all saved my mobile number in your name Reet. 

While greeting and departure you are always happy and never forget to say Vedamma good morning. And the way you stay bye so clear and with authority people do not want to leave you. 

Being innocent and adorable find your admirers, where ever you go. At that time, I become very possessive and do not let anyone even touch your face also. Whenever you are upset, only my lap makes you calm. I love that feeling and I just want you to be there in my lap always.

When you get up in morning, unlink your Bhai who always wanted to see me first.You are comfortable with Bhai and papa both. 

Music instruments and music tunes attract you most. You can play a drum, can manage a flute very beautifully. No tune of any song or rhyme is difficult for you to learn. I am glad that you are very open to new things and learn fast. 

All games which me and Bhai plays you have learned so fast and want us to play with you, let me tell you one thing you do not let Bhai and me play anything and we do not like same. We get very upset on same.

Odd eve a game which I took so much of time to understand, you ,learned it even when you were just 18 months. And now you have learned stone paper you call it Stoney, paper. You know chiddi ud and lun mirch very well. You love and laugh a lot when we play with you. 

And the most important of all, you are best at organising and reading faces. You do not like things in a messy way, while feeding if anything falls on you, you want me to clean that first. You always want to wash your hands if anything gets stick to it, I wonder how beautifully you have picked this from me. You always take initiative in cleaning your toys, I am so glad that we two ladies of house can make this house a clean and beautiful. 

Whenever anyone of us is upset you will come and ask in your cute language,  Kya hua....and when Papa scolds Siddharth you tell him timeout. You do not like sad faces around you and makes your efforts to create happiness around. 

Learning technology and how to operate any new phone, iPad we learn from you. Bhai is never successful in hiding his special games on iPad from you. Whole process of grinding his game and playing is so joyful for you. 

We cannot work on iPad when you are awake, as you love to watch videos of you on same. We have never thought you anything on same. Only help you need is to unlock password, I am sure soon you will be able to same also. You can spend hours watching your pic and videos, 

Putting you off to sleep has always been easy, we have moved to jingle bells and good night rhymes from Om shanti Om. 

You are naughtier than your Bhai and you know it very well, whenever I ask you Reet naughty girl or good girl. Your answer is always good girl. 

So my good girl, my chote Sãi. I love all these colors of you and want you to be always same in all of them. I know you love to tease your Bhai, but you will always be there for him when we will not be there. You will take care of him. I am writing this post as my effort to collect memories of your growing up for you and your Bhai to cherish it forever. 

Chennai 3 - Getting Spectacles!

You and I along with your little sister are siting at health care centre today to get your eyes tested. You visited this place last week with your dad and shared with me that you are going to get spectacles. 

I was in a meeting at that time and felt very sad to hear same, I could hear sadness in your voice also. I wanted to come home fast and tell you, son do not worry. This is all part of growing.  In that sadness I felt more connected with you. I could see that I wanted to share so many experience with you that it is perfectly fine. 

Few months ago, I always scolded you when you read in low light, in moving cars. But when I came home I was calm and you and I just glanced at each other and got rid of sadness in us. I am so glad on my parenting today. We do not have to lecture or talk, just being in that space for each other talks more than words. 

Today at health centre, you and I are going through this whole process of getting your prescription for   Lens together. I am glad that you are no more feeling sad, but I am still not completely comfortable with fact that you are going to have spectacles. While sharing with my brother today about your lens I had tears in my eyes. I am never nervous about anything in my life.. But today I am nervous as I am making myself responsible for same. I am thinking too hard , may be I have never worn glasses and somewhere in my mind there are thoughts that wearing spectacles is not a good thing. My worry is that in four days you  are leaving for residential school, how will you take care of yourself. Will you be able to manage spectacles. 

While I am going through all this set of emotions you seem fine and want to have nice set of spectacles for you. You are upset because doctor has told you not to read without spectacles and your spectacles are going to be ready in two more days. Your sister is enjoying whole process at much peace than you and me. I am feeling that it is so good to be innocent, as the way she is enjoying in health centre and at shop she wants to do everything you are facing. Sometimes it was so difficult for me to interact with your doctor as she is pulling all his instruments to herself to see what special is there that we are not allowing her. 

Looking at your sister and you , I am also feeling relaxed about fact of getting spectacles. One thing I want to share with you that you looked smart when you wore that red set of spectacles. In evening when you bought Black Forest Ice cream for me and your sister I loved the way you fed me. I was glad to see that most of genius people Steve jobs and Gandhi jee also wore spectacles. 

You are my genius boy always with or without spectacles. I love your passion of reading, sharing stories and way you get bored when you do not have anything to read or do. I know you were getting bored in also few days when you were told nov to read. I read few pages to you and was amazed at story of Percy Jackson we read together. Now I know why you read so much and can finish a book  in few hours. 

I want to write this post for you my genius son, that I am so proud of you and always remember that when you were born God smiled at you. I am sure that you will be a kind hearted man that I will always be proud of you.

I wanted to write this post for you that anytime you feel upset which I am sure you will not, have a look at below pic of your sister and remember that we should never let go of our innocence and take life in a stride the way it happens to us... And live it to fullest.... 

Chennai 2 - Being Innocent!!

We are called human beings, as we are always in a being of relationship. Relationships has always been my favorite, when Piya my sister in law who has a beautiful blog called chat over a cuppa asked me to write a post on this theme I immediately said yes to her.

I thought of writing this post on me and how I see different relationship around me. Like all of us, I have always loved to be in a relationship. My mom always say where ever you go you make friends. I have always been very simple, honest and innocent in my life.May be this quality of mine has attracted me to initiate talk with all of them. I never want to get this innocence out of me. For this quality of me,  I have been taken wrong by many of my close ones. But I still decided to be same to be innocent towards me and others. As I believe whatever God has given me has a purpose around it.

I love to share each and every small thing of mine with people around me. I do not know if all of us like to do same. I do not see many of grown up sharing joy and sorrow more, I see them filtering thoughts. I always remember when we were small there was always people around us. We have never thought on filtering our thoughts in sharing to them. I see this a lot only in children and want the child in me to be always alive.  

I am very happy and grateful to God for gifting me with a relationship of a proud mother of two beautiful children, a daughter to a proud parents, a sister to a loving & caring brothers and to a big heart sister, a simple and independent wife to a husband, a friend to all my friends and the most beautiful relationship of me  to me.

I dedicate this post of mine to all beautiful relationship around me who has given me strength and energy to lead this life, to follow my intuition and my dream. To my aunts at Sangrur and Gurgaon, Amma at Madurai, a close friend coach at Mumbai, my sisters at Chicago, Gurgaon, Melbourne and Bangalore, to smiling eyes, to my mentor didi at Gurgaon, a caring friend of hope at Delhi, to my close relative at Mukherjee Nagar, to my followers and to all my friends and family who has accepted me the way I am and being there with me always !! And to the most beautiful relationship on this earth which is not based on mutual benefit the one you have with your children and your parents have with you!!

First post at Chennai!!

When I clicked this picture, I never thought it will be used for this post of mine. This poster was made by Siddharth and his classmates at his school in Gurgaon on graduation day of class 4. I specified location Gurgaon, as I have moved to Chennai along with children. Moved on to a life of more peace and calm, moved on to new life, new phone, new car and a new dream to convert into reality. 

Chennai, everybody was scared that it is so hot here and how will we survive. Reet color will go black, how will you manage with new language and how will you manage alone. I was determined to come here. What has made me so determine to come and start life all over again, whether it was my ability to take up new challenges, or I was looking for a dramatic change in my current life, or I was seeing this opportunity as a dream opportunity for life. I will have all answers soon as I always believe we can only connect dots backwards. No one has seen future, I can only make my present beautiful and that will take care of my past and future both. 

Its been fifteen days that we have come here and it seems like I was always here only. All the cartons were moved out empty in three days, house is all set. Still I cannot remember places for different things, that time I miss my home at Gurgaon a lot. Struggle to find my things makes me feel sick. Since yesterday I am trying to find my Trifla Churan and office stamp. I miss my plants at Gurgaon, I miss my friends. 

There are so many challenges we are facing in terms of finding vegetables of our choice, newspaper we like, kind of food we are use to eating. But I am very happy taking this decision of my life, not even a single challenge making me feel that why I have come from simple settled life to make life settle again. 

All friends and relative from all over world and cheering me for this bold decision of  my life, some are comparing me with great people from real world. I do not think that I have done something great, I am just following my dream and intuition. I do not know any other way of living life so I decided to move on from land of paranthas to land of dosas. I wish and dream for a happy and great life for myself and my children here!!

Three Wishes!!

When yesterday morning you shared three wishes with me, I was thinking how smart my son is. It never occurred to me that we can have wishes like this. 

You first narrated story of a carpenter with me, that he got three wishes. He went to his wife and asked her to use three wishes. First wish was to have long hair and second one was she wondered what will she do with long hair, so she used second wish to get rid of her hair. Her husband got upset on his wife behavior and asked for new wife. And then he never lived happily. You shared mom why he did not think twice before asking for his wishes. If I get three wishes I will have

1. I would like to fly in the world

2. I want to have wish that whenever I say money, money should come. 

3. A wish that I can have number of wishes whenever I can. 

I was awestruck by your presence of mind and cleverness, we have read this story in our childhood also. I never thought that option number three exists. 

I love you for your expression, and wish that you remain as creative as you are today. May God bless you with a beautiful life. When you come to this blog you read wishes, and be happy to know how innocent and creative you are!! 

Words and language you express...

You have become my charmer all day, I just love to speak with you. I believe you also know that I ask you same question every time to hear your little sweet, clear voice. You answer me by saying words like boo or sometimes just laugh. 

You are very sharp in implementing things just like me, I get amazed to see how fast you have learned sentences from our day to day language. You speak in hindi and english both.  

• सारा नमकीन गिरा रही है , when you see something has been spilled on floor and you want us to come and notice it. 
• This is my chocolate , when you want something you want and your Bhai takes it away from you. I believe you picked this from me, when you want my bindi. I explain that this is my bindi and thats Reet bindi. You learn to express about your things.      
• Wanted ipad I always ask you what you want, you translated beautifully into wanted. 
• Wanted Water पानी water. You can translate words so beautifully and you are never wrong here. 
• Roti Paranthee Roti 
• Wanted this side, you use this sentence through out the day and don't let me sit or sleep. I use this word with you, when we go out and you go in other direction. Now when I am writing this post you have come atleast three times and moved me to your side. 
• सुनो बच्चे, मेरे दोनों बच्चे you imitate me so very well here.
• No for you is both yes and no . Only i can understand you when you say yes and when no. Rest everyone in house is confused. 
• ऊपर लो , when i am sitting on bed and you want to come to me. 
• निचे लो 
• TV कर रही है 
• खाना खा रही है 
• नमस्ते 
• बढ़िया है , जब हम पूछते है रीत आप कैसे हो 
• आपका नाम कया है - रीत 
• you do not like to feed food specially chapati, it is amazed how you learn on your own to break donw in to small pieces. 
• When you are playing with your toys you do not want to be disturbed and then you express it by your eyes first and then if Bhai still irritates you, you know how to communicate with him without involving me. 
• You can handle many things on your own by using the words from your dictionary, you started cutie pie and cupir tie but corrected it so soon that I could not enjoy much of your innocence there. 
• You love to show your love, hug and special kisses for Bhai and you never forget to say पारी पारी. When he is angry on you on spoiling his game you complain by saying मारा कर रही है , Toys कर रही है. 
• You could call your brother name at age of 20 months and can pronounce clearly all of Siddharth friends name like ishaan, gauri, anushka, Mani. 
• Our neighbor simply love when you call her name with so much of clarity "Sumanna" You like her when she calls you a brat dont you. 
•  You love to read books on your own, you are not much fond of toys. No corner in our house has been left without your exploration. You boost yourself by saying very good whenever you do something new and pass any challenge. 
• Your memory is great, you just need to be taught/shown once. Next time I may forget the way but you are there to remind me. Then I just love look and smile in your eyes. 
• I love your hugs when you know I am low and the way you show your special love to me.
• I am amazed at how beautifully and clearly you sometime convey to me by using whispers. 
• You and Bhai looks cute the most when you both put your finger on your lips to experss Shhhh....
• I know you love Bhai a lot and looks forward to spend time with him. 
• When I am working in kitchen and love to open drawer which I made for you to play with your own toys, 
• Fight for everything what Bhai is doing and he is kind enough to share things with you, you need to learn how to share my dear!!
• You sing so well at age of two year, your fav are ding dong bell, Oh my massi, who pulled her in, Bingo ( B I N G O) 
• and when you say bye bye take care which has been changed recently into bye bye see you!! 

And I am glad that you are there in our life, without you my life could not have been completed. I learn patience from Siddharth but you told me how to be at peace in life. I am happy to write this post for you, so that tomorrow when you grow you can know how beautifully you expressed yourself in toddler age. And for me to read when you are building your own nest!!

Below picture of you shows how beautiful and simple you expressed yourself at everything. This was taken at Delhi Haat when I was busy talking to artist for new design, you found these Ganesha and started playing!! 

Sports Day 2014

Siddharth sports day, is a demonstration of kids practise in field of athletes. All kids works hard to show us their strength on physical and concentration level to the parents and teacher. I have always enjoyed it like I enjoy all events in Siddharth School. This is the only show where I could relate it to some memories of my school days. Though it is very different from what it use to be for us.

 

This year sports day was very special for Siddharth as he participated in 400 meter Race. I was amazed to see him running. I could never run a complete 200 meter race and my son came won the race for 400 meters. It was a very emotional and happy moment for me.

 

Reet also enjoyed sports day, she was the charmer of Siddharth class, everyone wanted to hold her. She liked when they come one by one, she played with them.

 

Overall it was a great fun, here are some pics.

Way to Sports day Newspaper crated by students

 



Flying Sikh is popular now



 



So is Sanya

 

 

 

 

 



Siddharth with his class

 



March by Class V



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

Posing happily

 

I don't like too many people

 

 

Siddharth in 400 meter race

 

Second round

I Hope when Siddharth grows up, and comes to this space for his fond memories of Sports day and enjoy them as much as I have writing them here!! Amen!